Friday, November 19, 2010
YOU LIKE THAT, DON'T YOU?
The airport pat-downs have gotten so out of control that now there's a boycott being organized online. Really, people are feeling violated by all of the feeling going on. And let's face it, we're not feeling any safer.
Here's an idea:
No, really, hookers. I say that we hire prostitutes to do the pat-downs. Prostitutes, or as they're called in some states, "massage therapists," know how to rub you in just the right way. They do. I say we offer a special Prostitute Pat-Down Line in all of America's major airports (I think we already have one in Reno. Not sure). Travelers will happily pay for the service, so that's, like, good, right?
A happy ending, or safe landing, or whatever you wanna call it, will be had by all.
I think they'll go for this and if they do, I'm working on a list of in-flight gambling bets, like, "Guess which flight attendent isn't gay" and "Pick the baby to vomit first," you know, family friendly games of chance. The proceeds, minus my 20% fee, could help this great country of ours.
God bless you and God Bless America.
- BIG, THICK & HARD- YOU BET YOUR ICE, BABY
- FUGETABOUTIT, IT WILL
- GOING DOWN IN LAS VEGAS NEVADA
- YOU MUST BELIEVE IN YOURSELF
- BE LOVE NOW
- YOU LIKE THAT, DON'T YOU?
- THE STATE OF THE ART OF MOVIES
- WILLIE WATTERS OPENS UP
- BRUCE MERRIN: LAS VEGAS SHOW BUSINESS ROYALTY
- SINATRA SINGS SINATRA IN LAS VEGAS THIS WEEKEND
- JULIAN McCULLOUGH IS FUNNY AS HELL. FUNNIER
- YOUR MOTHER
- ▼ November (12)
- ► 2009 (90)